Love and Relationship

Stella is a top agent in her company and has just concluded her biggest business deal for the month. Her energy for the day has drained up and the coffee machine has broken. She can’t wait to be home to unwind for the day, pamper herself in a warm scented bath, and hope that her loving yet unemployed boyfriend is setting up a romantic dinner he has been promising her. With whatever energy left in her body, she walks home the moment the clock strikes at 5.30 pm. She enters into her home sweet home and her other half is lying around with his play station, watching her telly, eating the food she bought and then ask her to pay for his credit card bills for him! Stella is furious but she holds on to her frustration out of love.
The above example shows that Stella is dating a loser! According to most relationship gurus, the percentage of boyfriends taking advantage of their girlfriends who are financially capable is increasing at an upsetting rate. In this modern society, women can also be the major breadwinners because they have become far more independent than their mothers and grandmothers.

Money has been the number one issue for couples other than sex, infidelity or personal differences. Many new couples avoid discussing about money because they find it to be sensitive as well as unnecessary and this is a key reason for relationships to breakdown as it develops. Your relationship could have trouble surviving unless you find a way to balance the issue before the situation escalates out of control. If you are dating a man who does not contribute his responsibilities to the relationship, you will probably end up feeling cheated emotionally and financially when things don’t work out.

Try to talk about the real problem with him as well as his responsibilities to you and the relationship. In many cases, you will find him avoiding the subject matter and may even respond furiously or violently in order to protect his comfortable situation or insist that you continue feeding him, especially if you are a smart professional woman. So, what’s next? Well, if you cherish the relationship, give it a final attempt and consider consulting a counselor who specializes in couple’s therapy. If he is not willing to compromise despite all the discussion and counseling sessions, you know he is only after your money and the best solution is to get away from him ASAP! Never give in to this sort of man. Money cannot buy love and do not let him to brainwash you. Always remember that no man should think that he could escape from his responsibilities just because you are financially fit!

Take a simple test below to see if he loves your money – more than you!

• Do you have to pay when he takes you out for dinner?
• Do you pay for both movie tickets and popcorn all the time?
• Does he borrow money from you occasionally and never pay back?
• Do you have to buy the traveling tickets when the both of you go for a vacation?
• Does he argue with you when you ask him to contribute money paying for household necessities and bills?
• Does he drive your car all the time; refuse to buy his own when he can afford to or treat his own car as a “garage queen”?
• Do you find yourself spending three quarter of your paycheck on him every month?
• Does he ask how much business or money you made everyday when you come home from work?

IF YOU ANSWERED YES TO MORE THAN THREE QUESTIONS ABOVE, WATCH OUT! DANGER AHEAD! YOUR BOYFRIEND IS ALL OVER YOUR MONEY, BIG TIME!

I will discuss about men who fail to fulfil their responsibilities as a husband and father in my upcoming post. So, stay tune and be happy always :)

Many of us stay in a relationship despite it is an unhappy one because of the love we have for that special someone. Then again, a bad relationship is unhealthy for your mind, body, health and it can raise blood pressure, stress levels and cause emotional ache. Try my relationship quiz below to find out if you are in a healthy relationship and how you can fix it if your relationship is gloomy. Just match your answers to the corresponding icons or shapes and add up to check your result at the bottom of this post.

1) How often do you and your partner argue?
♥ Once in a while to clear the air
★Sometimes but I always feel iritated with my partner's behaviour but I am tolerating
♫ Almost never
◆ Almost daily

2) What is the main cause for argument?
★ Sex
♥ Insignificant and silly matters
◆ Clashes in opinions and views on life
♫ Not spending enough time together

3) How do you and your partner get back to normal after an argument?
◆ It will be days for us to speak to each other again
♫ We forgive and forget quickly
★We just go to bed and it will be all OK when one of us apologize the next morning
♥ We discuss calmly for a win-win solution

4) How often do you feel emotionally secure with your partner?
♫ Always
♥ Most of the time
★ Once in a blue moon
◆ On no account

5) Do you trust that your partner is faithful?
★ Not when things are ugly between us
◆ No way! I strongly suspect that my partner is having an affair!
♫ I guarantee that my partner will never ever cheat on me
♥ We all make mistakes, but I trust that my partner would not betray our love

6) What is your sex life like?
♫ Great!
♥ Good most of the time
★ Can be better
◆ Absent

7) If you are having a bad day, will you go to your partner for comfort?
★ Depends, sometimes I feel better talking to a close friend
◆ No, my partner will not comprehend, we will end up arguing and I will feel worse
♫ Yes, my partner never fails to cheer me up during my depressing times
♥ Yes, he will listen to me, allow me to complain and then do something sweet that makes my day again

8) How would you feel if you ever break up with your partner?
♫ No! I can't imagine living my life without my partner
♥ I will feel sad and devastated of course, but I know I will move on after that
★ I think about it at times but I end up staying at the end
◆ I feel life will be so much meaningful and wonderful all over again

9) Which of the followings stresses your life most?
★ Work
♫ What is stress?
◆ My relationship
♥ A little bit of everything

10) How happy are you in your relationship?
♫ I am very happy
♥ I am good most of the time
★ So-so
◆ Not happy most of the time

RESULTS!
Mostly ♫ - It is TOO Healthy
A relationship with no arguments is too good to be true. Arguments may not be entirely unhealthy for a relationship. Infact, arguments enhance the relationship with better understanding and also help to reconcile differences  to help relationship to grow. The key is to argue the smart way! Hence, do not be afraid to reveal your true self and it is absolutely OK to argue once in a while provided you do not argue over senseless matters.

Mostly ♥ - Wow!
Keep up the good work. You are in a stable relationship that offers mutual support. However, always keep in mind that you may still be in the honeymoon period or the experiencing the excitement of falling in love. You may need to work harder to keep the sparks alive once normality sets in. I would suggest you check out my post on 123 ways to express your love to maintain your relationship healthy and alive ;)

Mostly ★ - Err??
You are in a so-so relationship with uncertainties about whether you should continue or leave your relationship. This is not very healthy and often this is the time when people have affairs due to insecurities. You should rediscover the reasons why you chose to be with your partner initially and plan some quality time together to revive feelings of love and build on understanding.

Mostly ◆ - OMG!
It is time for you to save or leave your relationship. If you feel that the relationship is worth saving, make effort to improve the relationship to a state that is acceptable to both of you or seek professional help. However, if the relationship is resulting too much stress, depression or health problems, it is time to say goodbye.

Good Luck and stay tune for more quizzes =)